Good bye my love
Author: Philip Chan
Goodadvicechan@ Gmail.com
Sandra’s diary
Date: February 12
I don’t know how to love you any more, Eric.
I accepted open relationship and gave you more freedom. In the end, what I got was nothing but endless pain. Your infidelity has become worse.
Date: February 20
Every evening, I washed my face quietly with tears. I hoped someday
that God would help us regain the love between us. But I was wrong, and ended up becoming more miserable and more painful.
Date: February 22
You didn’t know how much I loved you. I tried to tolerate everything and avoid any friction between us. I kept the house clean and warm. Yet you still didn’t come home.
When will you understand my loneliness? Please show me a little loving care so that I can have a few seconds of happiness.
Date: March 1st
At times, I wanted to forget you but I couldn’t. I had asked myself why I still love you. I didn’t know what the answer was. All I knew was to struggle blindly and to expect pity from God.
Hopefully God has mercy on me and grants me a miracle so that you will smile with me and have a candlelight dinner with me.
Date: March 4
Before any miracle happens, I have no choice but learn to get used to this life of without you by my side. At night, when you were not at home, I couldn’t sleep but missed you.
Is this my fate or my miserable destiny?
Date: May 2
You hadn’t come home for more than a month. You changed your phone number and I had no way to contact you. You didn’t even say goodbye. Didn’t you know you had broken my heart? I cried so much that I now have no tears.
Date: Date June 16
This afternoon, I walked along the lover's lane where we used to walk holding hands. I hoped that I could find your shadow. Refreshing my memories, the lane and the sky were the same and but I was no longer a happy person. I walked aimlessly until I hit a tree and fell on the ground. I found my two knees bleeding. As I raised my head and looked at the tree, I suddenly remembered that we had carved a heart on the tree. I filled the heart with the blood from my bruised legs.
Looking at the blood-red heart, I began to realize that I was treated like dirt.
At this moment I seemed to see your shadow holding hands with another person. But all of a sudden, the shadow disappeared. Our love of the past had gone. It would never return. There was no reason to love you anymore and no meaning to wait for your return.
I finally had the courage to face the bloody heart on the tree and raised my voice to say, "Goodbye, my love."
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